Even so, I dread the thought of having to go back to work. I don't want anybody to look after my boys except me, and am heartbroken at all I will miss if they go into daycare. Not sure how to reconcile this. I'm even considering working evenings just so I can be home during the day with them, but S is not to impressed with that idea, so we'll have to see. I need to start researching daycare costs as well, just to see if it's even worth my going back to work, but I'm pretty sure my salary will more than cover costs and so that argument won't fly. There is a slight chance that I will be able to work from home (slight.....my office is notoriously against such radical innovation....it's a publishing company.....all work can be done online anyway....sigh) but I'm scared to broach that topic with my boss. They have been laying off over the past few months, so I'm worried that I will be next if I try to upset the applecart. Ack.
I'm writing this next to a screaming baby. He is so damned tired, and won't sleep. Won't. Sleep. At. All. I just put him down to yell for a minute...oh wait, he just fell asleep. I'm dead against crying it out, but pinch me if he didn't just stop shrieking and fall asleep. Ahhh, silence in the house of insanity.
I have no idea why this has started. He fights bedtime tooth and nail. His eyes are red and slitty from rubbing, he yawns and won't settle into playing or being carried or even eating. It's exhausting watching him. He keeps waking his brother. If you're looking for me, I'll be in the loony bin with the rest of the twin moms.
They have started waking more at night, and I feel as though I am back in those first two or three months after birth, when it seemed as though I never slept at all. Last night was better, they woke at 11 and then slept again until 5:30, heaven, but it's been more like 12, 3, 5, 8....and I have such a horrible time falling asleep between feeds because I am so tense anticipating the next howl through the baby monitor. But these nighttime feeds are quick, and they are very happy, and they go back to sleep right away. I wonder if the night wakings are related in any way to the fact that they are eating more solid food now. Maybe they have sore stomachs? Pin has diaper rash since he started eating solid food, I think because his poops are so yucky now. Duckling seems fine, no real rash, but he has some mean poops as well! I've moved them up a size in diaper, not because they are that much bigger but because they poo in fantastic quantities now, and it's always leaking out the legs or back.
Duckling:
- Still has no teeth, but drools incessantly. His shirt front is always soaked, and he has a rash around his mouth I think from drooling, but possibly a reaction to the one time I put cumin on his potato.
- Loves potato, rice cereal with mashed pear mixed in, chunks of pear, sweet potato, dried bagels, rice cakes spread with avocado or sweet potato and toast. Not too fond of zucchini or carrots. Likes broccoli and green beans, and will tolerate mixed grain cereal.
- Can roll from his front to his back, finally, this week.
- Has not slept in a swaddle for two weeks now, and is doing well. Flaps his arms a bit but settles down eventually (when he's not being screaming bedtime baby from hell).
- Loves the exersaucer, and his singing flower toy.
- Weighs around 19 lbs, has had three sets of immunization with little problem (slight fever, crabby for one day). Loves to swing in the park.
- Squeezes my nose, grabs my lower lip and pulls, grabs my face with his hands and pulls it to his face ('kiss mummy').
- Rolls, struggles, kicks when getting his diaper changed. Sometimes sticks his legs out stiff and crossed at the ankles, making it impossible to get the old diaper off or new one on.
- Laughs so much, smiles huge, just a lovely little boy most of the time (except for the screaming bedtime baby from hell episodes)
Pin
- Has four teeth, two up two down. Grinds them together incessantly, which is horrifying but he seems to get much entertainment from this.
- Loves rice cereal with pear, zucchini, potato, green beans. Not a huge fan of sweet potato or mixed grain cereal. Likes broccoli, dried bagel, and rice cakes spread with avocado or sweet potato.
- Smiles. All. The. Time. At strangers, at us, at the cat, at nothing in particular.
- Sleeps well, doesn't fuss to much when we put him to bed, unless he's truly not tired.
- Weighs about 19 lbs, has had three sets of immunizations with minimal problem, slight fever and crabby for a day.
- We thought he had reflux, and perhaps a stomach upset related to broccoli. Coughing, not sleeping well, vomiting more than usual. The doctor gave him pediatric ranitidine, and we gave it to him for a couple of days, and then his top two teeth came in and he seemed to settle down. We haven't given him any medicine and he's ok. Turns out teething symptoms can mimic reflux. Hm.
- Has not slept in a swaddle for two days, and is doing well. Flaps his arms a bit when we first lie him down but settles fairly quickly.
- Loves to swing in the park.
- Loves the exersaucer and the jolly jumper. He jumps in a little circle, on an angle, and it looks as though he's doing a restrained version of Irish dancing.
- Rolls across the floor, and sometimes gets wedged under the couch.
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